


White & Blue (and maybe Red too)

by AnnieJ



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Boys Kissing, Drunken Confessions, Friends to Lovers, I love metaphors, M/M, Mutual Pining, Re Written, i dont like boys but i love markhyuck, i wrote it drunk back then, sorry if its ugly, they're roommates here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-26
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-05-29 00:19:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15060950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnieJ/pseuds/AnnieJ
Summary: "Okay" Mark saysAnd for the first time in weeks Mark lets Donghyuck sleep beside him.And Mark is white and blue at the same time.-Roomate!au where Mark acts like he hates Donghyuck but that night Donghyuck got drunk and kissed him and Mark finally snaps





	White & Blue (and maybe Red too)

**Author's Note:**

> i rewritten this and i hope you'll still enjoy it!
> 
> (this is somewhat an epilogue for [another work](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14359626) of mine but you could read it on its own too :)

"Okay" Mark says  
And for the first time in weeks Mark lets Donghyuck sleep beside him.

 

And Mark is white and blue at the same time.

 

All he could remember is the feeling of Donghyuck's soft lips on his, and he swears,  
That night,  
He is all heartbeat, all heart, all feelings,  
And he doesn't know if it is because of the medicine that is starting to mess with his mind,  
Or the way the other boy pressed his lips on him so suddenly that night.

 

He believes it is not the latter, he is trying to believe that it is not,  
But it is so damn hard,

 

Donghyuck's sleeping next to him,  
All unaware of the sound of his heart beating out of his chest that he swears if Donghyuck wake up—right then, he would hear everything.  
and Mark still hasn't decided if he wants that or not.

 

But even the moon is listening to the beautiful melody,  
And she is starting to sing along with it,  
Telling him that _it is alright_  
That maybe Donghyuck is the song that has been playing on his mind after all,

 

And Mark tells her to _shut the fuck up._  
But the moon just smiles back,

 

Donghyuck is there,  
Sleeping almost too peacefully next to him,  
Looking too fucking beautiful, too freaking ethereal.

 

And for a mere second, Mark wants to touch him,  
His forehead, the tip of his nose, his cheeks, his lips, his _lips_.  
But Mark presses the thought away,

 

Yet, the galaxy inside of him screams, telling him to take a jump and do it,

 

 _just try!_ , They say,

 

Fuck

This time, he listens.

 

"...fuck im sick" Mark says, loud enough for Donghyuck to hear, to wake him up from a dream he's sure wont remember because it was definitely about him, yet he never reached Donghyuck's head, yet.

 

"Are you okay?" Donghyuck asks him, the sound of his voice is soft, and it is full of worries. and Mark wants to say that he is not, so Donghyuck could just think of him, even if it just for the fucking fever he has.

 

Donghyuck sees him red and pale and he starts to panic, jolting up from the bed, he sits between Mark's legs, and he touches Mark's forehead with the back of his hand.  
Mark is warm, way too warm.

 

Mark, now with a new shade of red, stares at the younger boy again,  
his heart swells. Donghyuck is too pretty, too beautiful for him.  
eyes full of worries, skin shining, reflecting lights from the moon that's glowing through the window beside him.

 

(And when the moon sees Mark's eyes on Donghyuck—she is so jealous, so damn jealous,  
for even people never looked at her the same way.)

 

 _It is too late now, my dear_  
The moon says

 

And Mark listens well enough to say _i fucking know_ under his breath

 

He closes the gap between Donghyuck and him,  
Putting his head on Donghyuck's shoulder, and Donghyuck doesn't shiver the way he does  
And he hates him for that,

 

 _It is not fucking fair_  
He screams inside,

 

The stars agree with him.

 

But he wants to have a reason to touch Donghyuck,  
His selfish self.  
Because he is just—there,  
In front of him, doing nothing,

 

Yet Donghyuck still opened him bare,  
Touching every corner of his mind, body, soul  
And it is not fucking fair  
How Mark can never even slit the other boy open  
When he is only flesh and bones in front of him.

 

_It is not fucking fair!_

 

The stars agree again.

Donghyuck shifts a little,  
"..okay wait, i will buy you medicines okay. Stay, you're burning up" Donghyuck says while trying to get up,  
Mark almost laughs because he is now damn sure it is not from the cold, all of this, and he wants to tell him that _its not the fucking fever,_

 

it is him, the boy with stars in his eyes and summer sun on his skin.  
how can he not see it?

 

How can Donghyuck not see him?  
He wants him to.

 

rather than saying ‘okay‘ or even ‘stay’  
Mark holds Donghyuck's waist instead with the both of his hands  
and for a moment he thinks about how beautiful Donghyuck is, like this, surrounded by his fingers, warmth spreading through his skin  
and how dangerous this situation is, to be finally able to touch Donghyuck like this, because he now wants more, more and more

 

Donghyuck got flustered because now Mark's head is still on his shoulder and his hands are now on Donghyuck's waist and Donghyuck could hear Mark's breath and it is driving him insane

 

"...a-are you okay?" Donghyuck asks, heavy breath and all.

 

Mark almost laughs again.  
_Fuck no i'm not_  
And Donghyuck could almost hear it.

 

The damn song, it is playing again,  
And the moon sings it louder this time,  
And yet Donghyuck _still_ couldn't hear it,

 

_How heartbreaking_  
If only he could hear this song, _  
The universe says, and she almost feels sorry for Mark._

_Not yet_  
The moon replies,  
_Just wait_

 

But Mark heard the universe too.  
And damn, it is breaking his cold fucking heart, he almost lost it,  
Almost.  
The galaxy inside of him holds him tight.  
Enough for him to breathe, to not scream or pull Donghyuck closer and just fucking kiss him,

because that's all he ever wanted,  
Fuck, he never wanted anything more.

The world is silent again,  
But it is waves and plane crashes inside Mark's head and yet it is only tiny whispers inside Donghyuck's.

 _Pathetic_ , the sky tells the moon.  
_Give it time_ , she replies.

Mark hears it again,  
And now he just cant fucking wait

His thumbs are now circling Donghyuck's waist and for a second the other boy flinches and _fuck_ , how Mark wants to take that damn one second to just fucking kiss him. He just wants to kiss him again, please. 

Mark doesn't know anything  
Yet that one move of him, is all that Donghyuck could feel,  
It is everywhere,  
Everywhere on his skin.  
And now he is also red,  
All heartbeats, all heart, all feelings 

Oh if only Mark could see it. 

The stars scream at Mark, for him to notice it, but the moon tells them to stay quiet. 

__It is a beautiful torture for them_ she said_

Mark and Donghyuck both silently agree.  
And the universe does too. 

Mark lets go of his hands and Donghyuck cant deny that he is too damn disappointed,  
He wants to scream too, if the universe lets him,  
Donghyuck wants to tell them that he would let Mark do anything to him. 

This time, the universe hears it,  
And she tells Mark immediately,  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
And now Mark could hear it too,  
The way Donghyuck body stiffens,  
And the way his breath stops.  
Mark could finally hear it 

_Fuck,_  
Thats the both of them  
And maybe the universe said it too. 

And thats it,  
Mark could not wait.  
Oh hell,  
The moon is now screaming so loud,  
_Do it!_  
The whole city could almost hear it, 

And Mark listens,  
But now not to her,  
But to his heart instead. 

He puts his hands on Donghyuck's jaw and the other boy is now just flesh and bones in front of him and he says _finally, fucking finally_

Mark forces Donghyuck to look at him in the eyes and Donghyuck shivers again,  
the dimmed light behind Mark that's colouring Mark's skin so beautifully is starting to fuck Donghyuck up with his hidden feelings. 

_Maybe its not the light, honey,  
Maybe its him,_

_It is him, my dear._

Mark looks at Donghyuck with everything he has, because thats exactly how much he would give him. everything.  
_Take it, take it until i am nothing._

The moon smiles,  
The galaxy, the one surrounding Mark and not the one inside of him this time,  
Finally speaks. 

They say 

_He was yours to begin with._

This time Mark is the one who kisses Donghyuck first,  
And he does it so carefully,  
With such tenderness, 

And something inside of Donghyuck doesn't explode, like when he thought it would  
Instead something blooms  
And Donghyuck swears he did not planted the seeds, who the hell—  
_Oh._

maybe Mark did 

_He did, honey_  
The moon says.  
_When you came home tired and a cup of coffee was greeting you on the table,_  
When you are not in the mood of eating and he suddenly ordered your favorite take outs,  
When he bought lavender for the house when you told him it reminded you of home,  
When it suddenly rained and you have yet to come home, he was running, outside of his mind, because you can't face the rain alone. Because it will remind you of that boy that broke you to pieces.  
And he hated that boy, without even knowing why. Because of the way he scarred you from everything. And these walls you build because of that boy, surrounding you like a stronghold, not letting him come inside, or even knock, because even if he did knocked, you would still not hear it. He was devastated, he tried to take better care of you than anyone ever did. He wanted to beat the crap out of this boy by loving every bits of you. He did honey, i saw it, the stars saw it, and the universe did too. 

_He planted that seed.  
And now it grows beautifully._

Mark keeps on holding Donghyuck like if when he finally lets go, Donghyuck would build that wall again around him,  
_this is my only chance_ , Mark says. 

And he did not realized that he was speaking the words that he thought was only running on his mind until Donghyuck answers. 

"...of what? what do you want?" Donghyuck answers him, lips never breaking long enough because it hurts to feel Mark's lips not on his, 

And he thought,  
I want you, this, whatever this is, and i will make it work, i swear, because fuck, i don't fucking know how you feel, but i love you, fuck, i love you so so so much, and i will still do even if that three words never fall from your mouth, because this is what i want, and i don't fucking know but maybe this is what you need too, fucking hell the universe was so fucking obvious that it was always you and me to begin with, don't say otherwise, and the moon kept singing this love songs that i don't want to hear everynight and under the hum of your breath i finally fucking realize that maybe i will try to listen to the song, and maybe you're everything in it. I love you, i love you, i love you, i love you. 

Those words never left Mark's mouth, but he still smiles because the universe will tell Donghyuck anyway,  
It will reach him anyway. 

Instead, he settles with "Whatever you want" 

Donghyuck could see it in Mark's eyes,  
everything.  
the words between them that were never spoken. 

and just like that, the words Mark never said splatter around Donghyuck and he now could feel _everything_ , and it is beautiful, too beautiful. Donghyuck's eyes starts watering because he could finally hear the song too. This time the moon did not sing the song, it is the galaxies surrounding Mark and him. It is everyone else. It is the whole damn city. 

And he thought, _this is it._

_The words will soon leave his mouth _  
The moon says to the entire galaxies who are still singing, and even the sun hears it and she is finally agreeing with the moon at one fucking thing__

____

"....God, i love you, i love you too Mark, i love you so much"  
Donghyuck says, too softly for the whole universe to hear, 

But Mark heard him, he heard him before he said it, and he heard him after him did, 

And it is everything Mark ever wanted and more. 

_See?_  
The moon says  
_We just have to wait_

They both silently agree.  
And the entire galaxy does too. 

**Author's Note:**

> i just joined [twitter](https://twitter.com/haechan_a), hit me up there and lets cry about Markhyuck together!
> 
> thankyou for reading xx


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